Five Love Langauages

Carl and I had the wonderful opportunity to attend a Strong Bond's event this weekend. It is a program through the military that encourages soldiers and their spouses and families. The one we attended was in Myrtle Beach, SC. It was just for couples. We got to stay at a beautiful oceanfront resort that was beautiful. I spent as much time as I could outside by the pool or on the beach. The beach is my happy place.
All our food was provided so we did not have to worry about a things. They even offered child care for those couples who could not find a babysitter. The rooms were provided and we even had an ocean view. It was amazing. I woke up every morning to see the sunrise on the beach. I definitely was in one of my favorite places to be.
To make it even that much more wonderful, we got to spend the weekend going through the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. The couple who ran the program have a marriage ministry called My Beloved Marriage Ministry.
We filled out a profile sheet that helped us discover what our love language is. We then discussed this with our spouses and discovered theirs. For Carl and I it was not a surprise at all. I have known what mine was for years and I was able to guess Carl's with no problem.
Mine is Words of Affirmation.
Carl's is Acts of Service.
No wonder we sometimes feel unloved by the other. I am giving him words and he is giving me acts of service. We are each showing love to the other in the way we most feel loved. We have it backwards.
Carl feels most loved when I do things for him.
I feel most loved when he uses words, whether written or spoken, to affirm me.
It is a struggle for both of us to make the other feel truly loved because it is difficult to do things out of our comfort zone.
Carl has a hard time putting his thoughts into words.
I have a hard time finding out what Carl needs me to do the most.
It is so common for couples to have love languages that are opposite of each other.
It was a very good weekend. I discovered that even though words of affirmation is my primary love language I do have secondary ones.
Listening to the session on physical touch I realized that non-sensual touch is very important to me. Carl also recognized this about me too. It is wonderful when couples learn things about one another that improve the way they communicate with one another.
The weekend was a good reminder for us both. On the way home Carl and I talked a lot. I started a list of things that Carl would like me to do for him. It is a good start.
For Carl, he recognized that he needs to work on his words to me. I woke up this morning and found this note he had written to me. He is off to a good start.
I love this man so much. I am committed to working on this marriage to make it be a witness to a world that needs to see two sinners loving each other in the strength and power of the Holy Spirit.